Why me? Why my rules? Both are fair questions and I expect to get a couple “who the hell do you think you are trying to tell me how to buy shoes?!?!” before all is said and done. That’s fine. I’m ready. My name is Patrick Morris and I write the rules as they should be in my world.

I’ve struggled with the concept of my importance for the past few years. It’s something everyone should do after growing up in a small protected community in Vermont and then jumping the shark and living in a place like New York City. Who wouldn’t have delusions of grandeur mixed with ‘grain of sand’ feelings of worth?

Now, there’s the possibility that I’m one of 70 some-odd-billion people who set up a blog because it’s free and gives them a place to write things like “what kind of cats I like”. There’s also the possibility that I am the premier enlightened human being in the history of the world and this is the only way that I am able to convey my wisdom to all my eventual servants. Hmmm…chances are it’s the 70 some-odd-billion option, but forgive me if I assume the “premiere enlightened” option whenever I can’t understand why chicken Caesar salads are so expensive. My goal in this blog is to help make a few things in life simple by setting up a few rules for events in our lives. By boiling down even the most basic events, I’m convinced people can focus on more spiritual and powerful issues such as “what to watch on TV” and “can I eat egg salad that’s been un-refrigerated for three hours?” I’m doing my part to make this world a better and more bloggy world. Forgive me, praise me, just don’t not read me.

Patrick